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Suicide A blonde and a brunette are sitting in a bar and watching the 11:00 P.M. news. A man is standing on the ledge of a high-rise building, contemplating suicide. The brunette says to the blonde: "I'll bet you $20.00 that the man jumps off that building and commits suicide." The blonde thinks for a moment then replies: "OK, you're on!" They watch for a few minutes and sure enough, the man jumps off the ledge. The blonde sighs and reaches for her wallet, but the brunette stops her, saying: "I can't take your money - I feel too guilty. I have to confess that I watched the 6:00 P.M. news this evening and I knew that the man would jump. The blonde replied: "Oh! I watched the 6:00 P.M. news too, but I didn't think he'd jump off again!" |
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Blonde joke A blind man enters a Lesbian bar by mistake. He finds his way to a bar stool and orders a drink. After sitting there for a while the blind guy yells to the bartender: "Hey, wanna hear a blonde joke?' A deathly silence transcends the bar. In a deep, husky, menacing voice, the woman next to him says: "Before you tell that joke, you should know something. The bartender is blonde, the bouncer is blonde, and I'm a 6' tall, 200lb blonde with a black belt in Karate. What's more, the woman sitting next to me is blonde and she's a weight lifter. The lady to your right is a blonde and she's a pro wrestler. Think about it seriously, Mister. You still wanna tell that joke?" The blind man pauses to think, and says, "Nah, not if I'm gonna have to explain it five times." |
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